Thursday 23 October 2008

Where is the love?

This morning really reminded me of skiing.

Saying that I've never tried it. I'm a snowboarder and from day one as a boarder you're taught to be naturally suspicious of skiers. It may be the pastel all in one jumpsuits, it could be the head bands, it may even be the way they do a silly little jump turn as they plant a pole with their knees together and their bum sticking out.

Anyway whatever it is it's best to leave them well alone.

Today the cyclists and the motorists got stuck into each other over who was more of a menace on the roads. The pedal pushers claimed the drivers were giving them no respect, that they were being pushed off the road and that they're all inconsiderate and forget once they were on a pushbike too. The drivers were shouting back lights would be good at night, that red lights mean stop even for bikers and that they should get off the pavements.

I got the feeling they're never going to like each other but they may just one day learn to tolerate each other.

Why not one day everyone swap? All the motorists get on a bike. All the cyclists take a car.

I doubt it would solve anything but it would be bloody good fun and I bet a lot quicker to get into work.

So here's the joke ...

Some race horses staying in a stable. One of them starts to boast about his track record. "In the last 15 races, I've won 8 of them!"

Another horse breaks in, "Well in the last 27 races, I've won 19!!"

"Oh that's good, but in the last 36 races, I've won 28!", says another, flicking his tail.

At this point, they notice that a greyhound dog has been sitting there listening. "I don't mean to boast," says the greyhound, "but in my last 90 races, I've won 88 of them!"

The horses are clearly amazed. "Wow!" says one, after a hushed silence.

"A talking dog!!!"

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I went soft on you today for Mental Maths but well done if you got a gold star. Even if you're fairly sure it takes nerves of steel to hand it in. Tomorrow comes the twist. Enjoy today.

YOUR STARTING NUMBER TODAY IS ... 10

times 9
take off 8
minus 7
add 6
add 5
add 4
divided 3
divided by 2

AND THAT'S YOUR FINAL ANSWER .... 15

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