Summer hols ...

So that's it - school's out for Summer.

Granted it's a little shorter than the retro 6 week holiday I was hoping for but a couple of weeks off isn't to be sniffed at, is it? Off to the South of France for a week and then will be surfing for week after in between finishing off things I should have done before I went off on holiday.

Have a lovely fortnight and fingers crossed the weather cheers up a bit. Will leave you the last two jokes to groan at and the last couple of Mental Maths to puzzle over.

Laters Potaters

Jon x

PS Am trying to persuade them to shell out for some Head Boy, Head Girl, Milk Monitor and Prefect badges to hand out. Also a flat pack Dunces hat for the class thickos.

So here are the jokes ...

During his spell in prison, Michael learnt carpentry and became highly accomplished. He was also a model prisoner so when the Governor wanted some work doing on his kitchen at home, he asked Michael whether he would help out.

"I've done the cupboards," said the Governor, "but promised my wife a nice kitchen work surface and, to be honest, I don't think I'm up to the job. So could you do it for me?"

"I'd like to," said Michael "But ..... it was counter fitting that got me here in the first place ..."
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And from Thursday ...

A Sunday school teacher reads a Bible passage to her class.

"And the Lord appointed a great fish to swallow up Jonah; and Jonah was in the belly of the great fish for three days and three nights. Then Jonah prayed and prayed for help with his whale based predicament.

And so the great fish was called from on high to vomit out Jonah upon the dry land.

When she's finished reading the teacher says - now children what does this story teach us.

Little Johnny raises his hand and says ...."You can't keep a good man down?"

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Here's the answer to yesterday's Mental Maths. Check it out on the show weekdays at 11.15am when I get back.

YOUR STARTING NUMBER TODAY IS ...
21
add 26
add the indiviual digits together
take off 17
times 9
add the digits together
reverse the digits
times 2
add it to the starting number

AND THAT'S YOUR FINAL ANSWER ... 183

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And finally the answer to today's Mental Maths. Check it out on the show weekdays at 11.15am when I get back.

YOUR STARTING NUMBER TODAY IS ...

14
add 27
double it
take away 1
divided by 9
times 6
take off 35
times 2
treble it

AND THAT'S YOUR FINAL NUMBER .... 114