Big Cricket Sunday

I should imagine this is exactly how Michael Vaughan feels.

Nervous pacing up and down, numerous checks in kit bag to make sure you've got everything, a growing sense of anticipation.

The BBC South cricket team is getting wheeled out on Sunday. Kevan James is heading up the wide array of talent and we've got our 100 percent record to protect. (Technically we have only played one game this season but nonetheless that's a 100 percent record and I'm sticking by it).

My new found baseball stance served me well last time - I know it's frowned upon however it got results - and I've been practicing waddling up and down the lounge with an orange between my knees to simulate running between the wickets with a box.

It's only a matter of time before the professional cricketers catch on to my genius. Bum out, knees bent, bat hovvering in mid air.

Time it right and you take the glory.

Time it wrong and you look an absolute chump.

Only time will tell if I time it this time if you see what I mean.

Have a great weekend and steer clear of Fordingbridge on Sunday afternoon. No idea where this ball is going to go ....

So here's the joke ...

Julius Caesar is addressing the crowd at the Coliseum.

"Friends , Romans and countrymen, I have returned from my campaign in France where I killed 50,000 Gauls!"

The crowd rises to it's feet and cheers "Hail, mighty Caesar!!!"

At this point Brutus jumps up and yells "Caesar lies. I've discovered he only killed 25,000!"

"Ah yes," replies Caesar "but away Gauls count double in Europe."