You never can tell

This radio business is a funny old game.

Just came off air today feeling the show was a bit flat. No idea why - we had some lovely guests and callers but it just didn't seem to take off.

Spent a few minutes with Producer Al and Claudia scratching heads wondering why in the post show meeting. None of us could put a finger on it but we all felt exactly the same.

And then an email pops up from management saying they thought it was a great show!?

How does that work?

It reminded me of exams at school. Do you remember the ones you came out of with that sinking feeling? You'd fluffed it - it's all over - there's no way you've passed. Those exams always were the ones you got your best grades in.

But you never wanted to come out of an exam feeling that it was really easy either. If you felt like you'd sailed through is was invariably a sign you hadn't. Even worse was when you'd finished the exam half way through and packed up your pencil case only to notice the cleverest kid in class was still scribbling, looking worried and slightly sweaty.

I never could tell then and I obviously can't tell now.

Mind you I'm assuming they actually listened ...

So here's the joke ...

A man goes to the doctors suffering with continual flatulence. After a consultation the doctor asks him to take off his trousers and lie face down on the couch.

Then to the man's horror, the doctor produces a six foot pole with a sharp spike at one end.

"What on earth are you going to do with that?!!" enquires the man.

"Open the window."
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Jon Cuthill is a presenter on BBC Radio Solent. You can listen to him every weekday from 9am-12.30pm, or listen again online at his website